Colossians 2:7"Rooted and built up in him, and stablished in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving."
Being brought up in a Christian home, I can relate, to an extent. We can abound in Thanksgiving when we relish in the faith of our youth. Why is that? Lack of confusion. Lack of doubting something you believed as a child. I think of how badly it messed me up, thank God the results lessen everyday, to have my parents divorce and then to have the man my mother loved torn from my life around six years later. I began to rely on both these men, only to see them flee from my life and hardly look back except a time or two. I'm not blaming them, nor do I want sympathy, I'm using it as an example of why when I became an adult, I heartily refused the idea of a safe, loving, dependent marriage. "No way," I thought. I'd take my chances as a single woman in a world where that behavior was acceptable. But what was I doing to my heart in the mean time? I was denying the truth and that will make you do some backwards things.
For example, I love kids, but every time I saw a child when I was at the grocery store or movies, I would claim I could NEVER be a mother. "Eew, yuck, ouch, nooo," said I. Not me. I had all these maternal qualities, but the idea of settling down with a man? No thank you. And, why? Because I had hardly ever seen a good example of what a loving relationship really was. I saw heartache and kids who were produced and seemingly just got in the way. Never would I be the one to introduce a child into the world. I'm telling you, that childhood of mine had done me over!
However, it wasn't all bad. I was raised as a Christian. I prayed a lot as a little kid. I was about nine or so when I did my first fast. Regardless of the fact that I broke it around 5:30 when I saw some mint chocolate chip ice-cream in the freezer, I loved God. I loved dedicating my life to God and having a purpose, having someone to talk to! Crazy as that sounds, I didn't have many people who I felt saw me, if that makes sense. Obviously, an omnipresent God is just the one to fill that void which is why I am extremely thankful for His existence!
It's interesting to me too, the verse that comes next. Verse 8 goes:
"Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ."That was exactly what happened to me when I went away to college! I saw couples who lived together and didn't support the sanctity of marriage. I saw families created out of wedlock and "it was fine." I saw a whole bunch of this and fleeting happiness, but no answers to the questions I had had as a child. Slowly but surely my faith started to be chipped away, but coming back to Christ has made a world of difference and I'm determined to share my story if it means saving anyone else the heartache if they think they have to do it all by themselves or that no one loves them. Loving God allows me to love others, regardless of what I knew from my examples. Thats why I was finally able to get married and look forward to starting a family. God loves us and thats more than enough to be thankful for this holiday season!
Love sincerely,
Jenn
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