That Moment When...

That moment when everything changes, but everything else has stayed the same.
When your world has stopped spinning, but you are the only one who has noticed.
That moment when dinner was left on, but you got called away and nobody else bothered to put it away.
That moment when reality faces the harshness of lies and deceit and evilness all bottled into one small person's attempt to make their own pain and indecentness go away.
It is the moment we all come subject to, at one time or another, in the realities of our lives.
I have never thrown a glass against a wall to watch it shatter, to see the ice melt in a puddle of regret and drained fury. But, I have seen a wilted flower once the sun stops shining on it and the water dries up and the mold begins to fester on the once green stem.
It is more than just forgetfulness, it is about not moving on and about being stuck in that one moment of isolation, of drama-like stillness when everything else becomes unavoidably obvious.
It is in that one moment when clarity might strike.
It hits you all of a sudden, when for no other reason, everything else becomes clear.
All the choices you could have made leading up to that one moment. All the decisions you have processed, and now must deal with correcting.
It is like that for all of us, the process of undoing.
We need to learn how to start over again, once the moment is over and out of us.
No one is above it, or too far from learning, but it is what you do with that moment that defines you, for you, forever.
I have never thrown a glass against the wall to watch it shatter just to see what it would do. But I have seen the ice melt in a puddle of regret and drained fury, and thought of how much nicer it would've been to be drinking my cold, refreshing drink.
In moments of regret, we might make a decision we wish we could change, but it is what you do with those moments in time, the ones we will never get returned to us, it is what you do with the aftermath of the mourning, that defines you.
What will you do with the morning's moment that is calling you out of hibernation? Calling you out of the colossal mistake that you have made? You already gave that grave error control for one moment, isn't that one moment all you want it to take? Reclaim who you are, and give yourself some grace to change from moment to moment. The next moment does not have to be the same as your last.

5 Disgusting Things I Do Every Day (As A Mom)

1. I may take every precaution to wash my hands before I eat, after I use the restroom, sneeze, etc. but when my kid has something sticky on his face/hands and a sink is unrealistic, I can guarantee one thing. I'm. About. To. Lick. My fingers and get that mess off. Even if it means repeatedly licking my fingers and involuntarily getting that icky, gooey substance in my mouth.

2. I smell, smell-check, look, feel--- for poop. Typically, this applies to diapers, but it has been known to happen under beds, in the bath, and anywhere else I get the mom-sense tingles going off. It happens.
That's not all. When a search turns out successful(?), I get to wipe that poop up! Now, this is usually completed while attempting to use as few wipies as possible. Yes, occasionally fingers become victims to cross-firing. Thank  God for soap and water. And oh, the joy of potty training. Sometimes those poopies get stuck in the pint-sized toilet, so I get to not only shake it in the toilet, but then rinse and wipe that seat out for next time! Yay!

3. I eat left over food. Yes, I realize many people eat left-overs. Hello! The doggy bag!? (I also know no one calls them doggy bags anymore). But, I'm not talking about run of the mill left-overs. I'm talking, my toddler wanted a bagel but wouldn't eat the edge so I'm eating the edges of half-bitten pieces that are already cold from sitting on his tray while he ate and I fed his brother. Or, I just made you a whole bowl of oatmeal, and although I put a piece of ice in yours and you took one or two bites with a slobbery spoon, you now claim to be full. And I am in a hurry. So, give me your bowl. Those types of left-overs. Sometimes a little better, and sometimes worse...

4. I smell things to see what my next step should be. Example One: My sons were home with Daddy yesterday while mommy worked, so he did bath time. Now, I am home today and again, bath time. My sons wash their hair every other day. By the third day, their hair smells like a mixture of drool from the night before, whatever we had for breakfast that morning, and whatever was for dinner the night before. Since my son is unreliable in this department (his answer is almost invariably Yes! Dad washed his hair. Why? Because he prefers if it never gets washed), I must do the smell test.. It is a rare treat when I do not pull my nose away repelled. It is most often my turn to wash their hair.

Example Two: Smelling the milk to see if it has gone sour. Who doesn't do this risky game? The chances are 50-50 you won't be able to eat the rest of the day...

5. I brush my son's teeth. That's average, you may be thinking. Except, I haven't quite got this one figured out. See, he usually "brushes" his own teeth, but when it comes to the tongue, the germ hub for the entire population, I have to do the scrapping myself. I obviously cannot see his tongue if he points away from me. So? So, you guessed it. I look him square in the face as I brush his tongue for stinky, icky germs. That inevitably spray me in the face. Great.

In the spirit of Mother's Day, enjoy all those yucky habits. Mothering isn't for the weak (stomachs). ♡♡♡